Is just a “good” baby one who sleeps a whole lot and doesn’t cry much? Most people say “yes,” and their answer is understandable. “Good” and “fussy” are judgmental terms people often use to spell it out the behavior and temperament of a baby.
Parents often believe that the youngster is really a reflection of them. They want a content baby who’s easy to care for and who gives them an atmosphere of success. And many parents feel bad if their baby cries or has colic. Labeling and judging babies for their behavior isn’t useful because they’re only expressing their needs in the simplest way they can.
When babies cry and fuss, they’re telling their parents that something’s wrong. They’re tired, hurt, uncomfortable, hungry, wet, scared, or having to be held.
Labeling babies begins very early. One new mother was told with a maternity nurse that her hungry infant had been crying in the nursery. “Just what a fussy baby you have!” Out in public places, a well-meaning person will say, “Just what a good baby. Is he always such as this?” This type of question can put the mother in a bind. Although she may answer “yes,” she could also remember that the last week he cried all throughout a shopping trip.
Among the hardest times to deal with a crying infant is at night. After giving to your infant all day long, you might feel drained and resentful when you yourself have to offer again at night. You may grit your teeth when awakened at 3 a.m. and feel overwhelmed. But if you’re able to consider your infant as expressing needs, you might feel more accepting.
Once you realize that your baby’s crying is a type of communication, you may find yourself responding differently, trying to understand just why he cries, or why he doesn’t sleep as much as you think he should or as much as you’d like. And it’s also possible to feel less harassed whenever your baby fusses in public. It’s better to be comfortable with him when you no longer feel pressured to have a “good” baby.